Who Is That Off-key Geezer Singing In The Kitchen?

We got a dusting of snow last night and it
was snowing lightly as we opened presents this morning. The Wrongologist had ordered
more snow, but was told that everyone wanted some, so it needed to be spread
around and that was all he could get.


Like most people, the Wrongologist is
seeing family and friends over the next few days. More likely than not, there
will be songs sung in the key of off; by a sib, a child or a grandchild.

Most years, he and his brother sing this song:

“Christmas time is here, by golly

Disapproval would be folly
Deck the halls with hunks of holly,

Fill the cup and don’t say “when.”

Kill the turkeys, ducks and chickens

Mix the punch, drag out the Dickens

Even though the prospect sickens,

Brother, here we go again.

On Christmas Day you can’t get sore
Your fellow man you must adore,

There’s time to rob him all the more

The other three hundred and sixty-four.


Relations, sparing no expense’ll

Send some useless old utensil,
Or a matching pen and pencil

“Just the thing I need, how nice.”

It doesn’t matter how sincere it

Is, nor how heartfelt the spirit.
Sentiment will not endear it
What’s important is the price.

Hark, the Herald Tribune sings,

Advertising wondrous things.
God rest ye merry merchants

May you make the Yuletide pay;

Angels we have heard on high,

Tell us to go out and buy.

So let the raucous sleigh bells jingle,
Hail our dear old friend Kris Kringle.

Driving his reindeer across the sky,

Don’t stand underneath when they fly by”
 

Title: A Christmas Carol

Artist: Tom Lehrer

Merry
Christmas, Happy Festivus, Happy Chanukah & Happy New Year to All-Let’s
hope the division in our country is somehow healed.

And that peace on
earth, good will to humankind goes viral in 2013
.

 

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